Life Hack
Back to Basics: The Tickler File
A long-time standby in the productivity realm, a tickler file is a reminder system intended to act as an adjunct to your regular calendaring and scheduling system. Although there are several different kinds of tickler file, the most well-known (thanks largely to David Allen’s Getting Things Done and Merlin Mann’s 43 Folders) is the 43-folders system, with 31 numbered “day” folders and 12 labeled with the months of the year.
The idea is quite simple: anything you need reminded of on some future date goes into your tickler file. Every morning, that day’s folder is pulled out and the contents placed into your inbox, and whatever you placed there days, weeks, or months earlier is right at hand when you need it.
The 43-folder setup makes it possible – easy, even – to set reminders for up to a year in advance. Each numbered folders stands in for a day of the month. Behind them, all the folders labeled with the months are arrayed, with next month’s folder in front. So, since today is September 5th, you would see folder 5 at the front, followed by 6-31, then October through next September. When I empty today’s folder, I’ll place it at the back of the numbered folders, leaving “6” standing ready to be pulled out tomorrow.
At the end of the month, the October folder is opened and its contents placed into the appropriate numbered days, and the emptied folder is placed at the back of the months. This creates a rolling cycle of folders, presenting each morning the folder with that day’s contents in it.
What goes into the folders is up to you, but clearly anything dated is a good candidate: bills, invoices, dated material to send out, concert and show tickets, travel documents, and so on. Other items you know you’re going to need on a specific day can also be added, such as your passport on the day when you will be flying out of the country, or your checkbook for bill-paying day.
Recurring events you want to remind yourself of – like watering the plants every three days – can be written onto index cards. You empty your folder into your inbox, process the inbox, see the reminder, water the plants, and place the card into whatever the date will be three days later.
Some people use the tickler file as an “out” from their inbox. That is, if by the end of the day, they haven’t processed their inbox to empty, everything goes into tomorrow’s ticker. I’m not a huge proponent of this, but I suppose it does give them some psychological satisfaction to leave at the end of the day with an empty inbox.
The hardest part about using a tickler file is actually starting to use it. Getting into the habit of placing things into the tickler file, and then checking it every day to get them back out, can take a while. In fact, you may need to do what I did when I first started using a tickler file: set a reminder for your reminders! That is, I put a “check tickler file” task into Outlook and set it to recur every morning. Sure enough, every morning I forgot until the notification came up to remind me.
Eventually, though, using the tickler file becomes a habit. As you add more and more stuff into it, you’ll be more and more likely to check it, and as you check it more and more you’ll be more likely to put stuff into it. The two habits are mutually reinforcing, so after a while you reach a “critical mass” and the forgetfulness ceases to be a problem.
To get there, it really helps to keep your tickler file somewhere in plain sight (without being in the way). Desktop file boxes are perfect for this – generally under 12”/30cm deep, they don’t take up much space, they come in a variety of attractive (and, I admit, not-so-attractive) designs, and their open top means there’s not the slightest barrier to taking out today’s file.
Used consistently, a tickler file can become an important part of your “outboard brain”, popping stuff up for you when you need it, and keeping it out of the way when you don’t. In today’s all-high tech all the time world, it’s even a little reassuring: simple, decidedly low-tech, and effective.
Bonus tip: This is a tip I ran across here, and it’s so good I had to include it. The standard 43-folders setup gives you dates but not the names of days, which can be confusing. Use binder clips, labeled with the days of the week and clipped onto the top of the front 7 folders, to identify the days. As you remove each folder and move it to the back, place its clip on the folder after the last one with a binder clip. Brilliant!
Dustin M. Wax is the project manager at Stepcase Lifehack. He is also the creator of The Writer's Technology Companion, a site devoted to the tools of the writing trade. When he's not writing, he teaches anthropology and gender studies in Las Vegas, NV. He is the author of Don't Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College.
Related PostsA First Look at Mozilla’s Ubiquity
You’ve probably heard of Ubiquity by now. It was causing quite a buzz a few days ago before Google Chrome came along and stole all of its thunder.
Ubiquity is an experimental Firefox extension that bills itself as “a powerful new way to interact with the web.” One way to describe Ubiquity that gives you a clearer idea of what it’s actually all about is that it’s Quicksilver for the Internet.
We’re all used to the point-and-click, foreign and unnatural way of interfacing with the web. Ubiquity tries to change the way we interface with the web by allowing us to use language rather than buttons and endless URLs. For instance, if I want to post something I see on the web to Twitter, I’d usually have to copy the text, navigate to Twitter, log in, paste the text and press submit. With Ubiquity, I can select the text, summon Ubiquity and type “twit this.”
For me, when I realized that the developers had connected the word “this” to various means of input selection, I realized that there have been many simple ways to create more human interfaces for a long time, but we’ve ignored them. Let’s be honest, there’s nothing technologically groundbreaking about getting a computer to understand “this” as the text within your selection, but in the current state of the web, there’s something groundbreaking about it from a user interaction point of view.
Useful CommandsSo what exactly can Ubiquity do? Anything really, since creating new commands is pretty easy. But most of us don’t want to do that, so here are a few of the commands that come with Ubiquity, or that you can easily get from the Herd.
Before you invoke a command, you need to summon Ubiquity. Call up the Ubiquity window by pressing Alt/Option + Space, unless you’ve changed the summon shortcut to something else.
Wikipedia: Do quick, on-the-spot research with the Wikipedia command. In full it’s wikipedia inserttopic, but you can substitute w for wikipedia to get there faster.
Define: Typing define word will return the definition of a word within the Ubiquity window.
Send This To: Select a chunk of text and, after summoning Ubiquity, type send this to person. It’s almost creepy watching it open Gmail and set up a message with the selected text in it, correctly addressed to the right person.
Get Lyrics: This one doesn’t come with Ubiquity, but you can grab it from the Herd. If you want to know the lyrics to the song you’re listening to, summon Ubiquity, type get-lyrics Welcome to the Jungle and you’ll be presented with a Google search page with various lyrics for that song. I would like it better if it took you straight to a lyrics page, but this is okay in the meantime.
Maps: When I heard Ubiquity did maps, I thought if you gave it a street number and name, suburb and state, it would throw the map up for you. It does do that, but it can do a lot more. I thought I’d see if it could find the location of my very first job when I was in high school, with only minimal information. As you can see, it did:
If you click the map thumbnail, it enlarges and provides you with a link: “insert map in page.” If you’re on a regular HTML page, you wouldn’t expect this to work, but it does. More useful, though, is the ability to quickly drop a map into an email:
To get to this point, I had to type “Helensvale KFC,” select it, summon Ubiquity and type map, click the map and click a link. It takes about ten seconds to get a map in your email, compared to the five minutes it used to take.
Room for ImprovementLet me briefly preface this section. A pet peeve of mine is when software reviewers slam an app and call it useless when it is clearly beta or even alpha software. It irritates me, so I’m certainly not joining in. So here goes: this software is a 0.1 release and any issues I’ve mentioned here are observations that I’m sure will get fixed eventually. None of this is deal-breaking because the app is very early on in its development.
The first issue I came across during my time with the software was that the weather implementation isn’t the best. If I look for Brisbane’s weather by invoking Ubiquity and typing weather brisbane, it works fine. However, if I ask it for weather gold coast, the Gold Coast being where I actually live, I get nothing.
But if I go to my OS X dashboard and type nothing but “gold coast” into Apple’s Weather widget, which uses AccuWeather.com, I get results right away. Is this a problem with Ubiquity? The weather site it uses or the API the weather site supplies? I don’t know, but I know that there are better weather services out there.
The second issue I had with Ubiquity may only be an issue because I’ve been spoiled by Quicksilver, but nevertheless there’s room for improvement in the way Ubiquity takes the text you’ve typed and looks for one of its commands that closely matches.
When you summon Ubiquity and attempt to invoke a command, the list of options presented doesn’t search intelligently. For example, I use Quicksilver to call up the Start-up Disk Preference Pane whenever I want to boot into Windows on my iMac. Quicksilver will find that pane and let me invoke the right command whether I type any of the following:
- Of course, startup (I use it regularly enough that st or sta will work too)
- artup
- starupd
- diskpane
- starttuuu
You can make spelling mistakes, miss letters, or start from the second letter or even second word of the command, and Quicksilver will still find it for you.
As far as I’m concerned, this intelligent search is exactly why Quicksilver is so useful as an app launcher. To be truly powerful, Ubiquity must implement something like this. I know this is 0.1 software, so I don’t really expect these features to be present, but I’d say if it’s not in there by the big 1.0, then this extension is going in the wrong direction.
The Bottom LineThe bottom line? Download it and try it. See if it’s for you. Personally, I swear by apps like Ubiquity and Quicksilver and I think everybody should use them.
However, not everyone agrees, so give it a shot and see if it’s right for you - but give it a fair shot and spend some time with it before you reject it. If you can’t try it because you’re not using Firefox, that’s fine… unless you’re still using Internet Explorer. In that case, go and download a decent browser!
Offering a unique perspective and insight on productivity based on his experience as a writer, musician, family man and manager, Joel Falconer has been published online and off, and brings to Lifehack's readers practical advice you can use to be more efficient and effective.
Related Posts5 Tips To Beat a Standardized Test
I keep thinking that I’m completely done with standardized tests. I took the SAT and ACT in high school and thought how great it would be to not take anymore tests. But I wasn’t counting on placement tests and the other opportunities my professors found to pull out the Scantron sheets in college, and I certainly wasn’t thinking about the placement exams necessary for graduate school and many jobs.
As we get ready to head back to school, or go looking for jobs, or think about accreditation for our career of choice, it’s worth thinking about the tests that are coming up. Not so that we can worry about what score we’re going to get but so that when the big day comes, we can beat each of those tests.
1. Understand test formatsThe thing about giving the same test to a whole bunch of people is that you have to make the questions understandable even for someone who will be taking the test cold. If a teacher is giving you a mid-term, she knows exactly what was covered during her lectures. But if a prospective employer is testing you on your computer skills, he has to make sure that the questions are written in such a way that anybody can walk in and understand them. That means that most standardized tests avoid jargon as much as possible. They also adhere to easy-to-use (and easy-to-grade) formats, like multiple-choice and true-or-false. Being comfortable with these formats gives you a head start.
2. Take sample testsIf you can get a sample of the test you’re planning to take — or even a few sample questions — take advantage of the opportunity. Just taking a dry run once through before the real test can raise your score significantly — knowing that the questions aren’t horribly scary and recognizing the question format simply makes you more comfortable with taking a high-stakes test. Luckily, getting sample tests is usually just a matter of asking. College Board, the makers of the SAT, for instance, offer free sample tests on their website. It’s more than a matter of comfort. Familiarizing yourself with the test can help you understand questions better and answer them faster, important abilities on lengthy tests.
3. Read up on the scoringThe thing that tripped me up about the ACT and the SAT is the different way in which the two tests are graded. On the SAT, you lose a quarter of a point for every question you get wrong. On the ACT, there’s no penalty for incorrect guesses. That means that on the ACT, if you don’t know an answer, you should always guess. The worse that can happen is that you aren’t penalized. On the SAT, though, guessing a lot can get you into trouble. If you have no idea on the answer, you’ve got a 75 percent chance of losing a quarter of a point, and those can add up fast. If you can’t eliminate one or two of the answers, it’s probably not going to benefit you to guess.
Test scoring varies greatly. It’s up to you to know how the test you’ll be taking is scored — and to figure out if guessing is really a good strategy if you don’t know the answer. If you will be taking a test that doesn’t penalize for wrong answers, though, there shouldn’t be an unanswered question on your test sheet. Maybe you’ll get lucky.
4. Don’t go overboard on the studyingI would never advocate walking into a test without having studied at all, but that doesn’t mean you need to spend every waking hour studying. Even on bar exams, there are definite limits to the questions that will be on the test. There should be limits on how much you study, as well. In theory, you should have learned most of what you need to know for any given test in the class or course of study (like law school) proceeding it. Preparing for a test shouldn’t be a case of actually learning material — it should be more of a matter of reviewing it. That is an ideal scenario, of course. You may need to study quite a bit — but you should still spread it out. Cramming all of your studying into the few nights before the test is a sure way to let the test beat you.
5. Think about taking the test laterThere is not a single standardized test that there is absolutely no chance of retaking. Sure, there is typically a high cost associated with retaking it, but it’s important to remember that taking the test again is an option. I taught SAT test prep in college and I had one student who kept getting entirely freaked out by even the thought of sitting down to take the test. What finally got her to the table was the thought that she really could take the test as many times as she had to. Her parents didn’t particularly like the idea of paying for multiple tests, but they told her that if she struggled the first time, they’d pay for a second try without question. Eliminating the high-stakes can do wonders for the stress that normally distracts test-takers. Think about it: even if you had to wait a year or two to put the money together for a second shot, you’d still have the choice to do so.
Thursday Bram is a freelance journalist of over five years experience. She studied Communications at the University of Tulsa and is currently working on her MA in Communication Design. Her work has focused primarily on entrepreneurial topics. More information about Thursday is available at thursdaybram.com.
Related Posts10 Keys to Work/Life Balance
Today’s employers seem to want more of our time than ever. In the US, the average worker puts in 55 hours a week; in Europe and other places where short working weeks have long been the norm, workers are struggling to hold on to their reasonable schedules as employers look to the US model in an effort to increase their bottom lines. Email, text messaging, cell phones, and Blackberries keep us tethered to the office even when we’re technically “off-duty”.
How can you keep up with your always-on career and still find time to do what you need to do at home, spend time with your family, enjoy some kind of social life, and just plain relax? At risk are your personal relationships, your development as a person, your sanity, and even your life. Stress kills. You need downtime to help your mind and body cope with the demands of your job.
That’s the question I asked readers in the first installment of our Great Big Summer Giveaway. Some of the answers are below, along with a few of my own ideas about balancing work with the rest of your life.
1. Attitude is everything.No matter how much you love your job, no matter how big a part of your life it is, ultimately you need to be able to “turn it off” and spend some time not working. This is hard for a lot of people, because their work is an important part of who they are as people. This can be admirable, especially when you accomplish great things in your work, but an always-on-the-job attitude can be harmful in the long run. At the least, the peope around you will get tired of coming in second to your work, causing damage to your relationships and eventually leaving you without them. What’s more, it might even reduce your effectiveness in your work — both the mind and body need a break from thinking about and doing the same things all the time to recharge and keep coming up with fresh ideas.
2. Keep a rational schedule.The more you’re trying to juggle, the more important it is to make a good schedule and keep to it. Block out all your work and non-work commitments and make sure to allow plenty of downtime and non-work time. Treat non-work commitments as seriously as you treat working commitments — the time you’ve assigned to family, housework, and your own activities needs to be just as inviolable as the time you spend in the office, going to meetings, or meeting deadlines. This is especially true if you’re so busy that you can’t reschedule that off-work time.
3. Learn to say “No.”If you’re having trouble keeping on top of everything going on in your life, it may be that you’ve committed more time than you have. If you’re like me (and just about everyone else), you don’t like to refuse favors, new responsibilities, or even casual requests, for fear of a) looking undependable, b) upsetting someone, or c) missing out on something. Make a point of seriously considering any request that comes your way, and double-check your schedule before taking anything else on. When it’s too much, don’t be afraid to refuse — you won’t be doing anyone any good by taking on tasks that you won’t be able to do well because you’re too overwhelmed to handle them, or by accepting social invitations that you’re too stressed out to enjoy.
4. Enjoy list-free time.This tip comes from Sheree, who says she stopped making lists of things to do in her off-time because of the stress that not finishing the list brought to her weekends. While it’s reasonable to want to bring the skills you’ve honed at work into the rest of your life, if it starts to make your non-work time feel like just so much more work, then stop. Drop the list for a day or two, and take things as they come. This is really about attitude, drawing a clear line between your work-life and the rest of your life.
5. Keep it organized.There’s nothing worse than finding yourself faced with overtime or extra working days because you didn’t get enough done at work. Kim suggests a whole set of organization tips at her blog, Cupalatte, such as:
- Have as little out as possible: meaning nick knacks, decorating items. My desk has nothing except my computer and phone. Maybe boring but I get things done. My house has very little out also so there is less cleaning and less dusting. Less vision clutter makes me feel more zen anyways.
- Give away what I don’t use “regularly”: I feel lighter and giving it to someone with a bigger need makes me feel less guilty for getting rid of good items.
- Going paperless: my office is paperless. Need I say more? There’s no getting up looking for files, misfiling, paper waste, toner waste, buying folders, buying paper. Oh, and being able to fax and email documents in seconds saves so much time.
- Use grouping: for everything. I “group” my medicine cabinet into “morning items” versus “evening items”. For example, morning items would be hair serum, sunblock, make up, deodorant. Evening items would all be “grouped” together too, face wash, floss, toothpaste. My cooking cabinet is grouped into “dry seasonings” & “wet seasonings”. My fridge is grouped into “breakfast” items and “lunch” using the clear plastic $1 container so that with one scoop, I have all the items I need and don’t need to revisit the fridge. As for cleaning up, everything gets put back in the plastic container and returned to the fridge “once”.
This was also recommended by Kim at Cupalatte, but bears its own mention. Batching tasks can be a great way to get more done in less time, whether it’s handling your work email or your mail at home. You’ll work faster and better because your mid is only on one thing, and when it’s done, you can forget it — so worrying about that bill you have to pay or that email you should respond to doesn’t “spill over” into the rest of your day. You know that your bill will get paid during your normal bill-paying time, and your email got responded to when you processed your email.
7. Clear your mind.Dave Smyth finds making lists useful so he can stop fretting about what needs to be done, knowing he won’t forget anything.
I used to always have a dreadful list that was always running through my mind of all the things that I needed to accomplish, mainly work related. They would interrupt my family time causing me stress at just at the time that I am trying to reduce my stress. So the quicker I can get things into a list or email that I know I will work later, the better off I am.
On the whole, I agree with Dave — lists are crucial — but there’s something to be said for Sheree’s notion of doing without one for a day or two a week, so that relaxation time doesn’t start to feel like more of the daily grind. The key point here, though, is to do whatever it takes to confine all the things you’d be liable to worry about to a trusted system where you know they’ll get taken care of, so you can spend the rest of your time without worrying.
8. Get it wrong the first time.Bon Temps at Le Bon Temps Roule offers this tip as a way to get last-minute projects and other time-consumers out of the way so you can get on with your life. The idea is to give yourself a set amount of time — say, an hour — to do the job, no matter how poorly. Let go of your perfectionism and just do as well as you can in the set time. You may have to go back and fix it up — but you’ll be charged up by knowing the “heavy lifting” is already done. Plus, by forcing yourself to cram the whole job into a short time period, you’ll give yourself a more “global” view that might help you see things you wouldn’t have otherwise. Obviously, this isn’t going to apply to every situation — if your boss comes to you with a last-minute report that has to be generated, this will work great; if your boss asks you to fill in for the other neurosurgeon, who got caught in traffic, a little perfectionism is probably in order.
9. Keep the lines of communication open.I learned this the hard way when a rough patch of work started to alienate me from my family. Let the people closest to you know what’s going on in your work life when things get hectic, so they don’t feel like your lowest priority or worse, suddenly abandoned. And keep your ears open to hear what they tell you, too — if your spouse or partner, your friends, or your kids start complaining — or tell you straight out that you’re working too much — listen to them. They’re generally going to be a better judge of your behavior than you are.
10. Be honest with yourself.This is the hardest one, but also the most necessary. Part of your weekly review — or at least every third or fourth one — should be to ask yourself “Am I happy with all this?” And to follow up by looking at how well you’re doing of balancing everything. Be honest — this is your life we’re talking about. If you can’t face the hard questions, all the lifehacks and organizing won’t mean a thing — you’ll just slide away.
Dustin M. Wax is the project manager at Stepcase Lifehack. He is also the creator of The Writer's Technology Companion, a site devoted to the tools of the writing trade. When he's not writing, he teaches anthropology and gender studies in Las Vegas, NV. He is the author of Don't Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College.
Related PostsYour Creative Genius Mindset: The Essential Qualities for “Outside the Box” Thinking
Click on the IQ Matrix image to view larger version.
To be creative, is to have the capacity to think freely, openly, without limitations or constraints about problems and challenges confronting our life reality. When we are creative, we tend to see opportunities and possibilities that we would normally filter out of our personal experience. Creativity allows us to think outside of the box, around the box and through the box in an imaginative and free flowing manner.
In today’s day and age, our ability to think creatively about our life circumstances will help us to overcome the never ending problems and challenges that a “normal enriching” life throws our way. In retrospect, there are a plethora of strategies, techniques and tools that we could utilize to enhance our creative capacity, however for many people, these methods would be futile, because creativity first begins within the mind. If our mindset isn’t aligned and tuned into the “creative thinking channel”, than we will severely struggle to find the creative answers we are so desperately searching for.
The Mindset of a Creative GeniusA Creative Genius has a certain set of qualities, beliefs, methods of talking to themselves, asking the right kinds of questions and taking strategic actions that naturally cultivate creativity within the recesses of their minds. By consistently and persistently instilling these traits into your psyche, will help you to supercharge your mind and unlock your capacity for creative thought.
The Qualities of a Creative Genius MindFlexibility: A Creative Genius is flexible in thought, opinion and in the decisions they make on a daily basis. Flexibility naturally encourages “outside the box” thinking which expands possibilities and opportunities.
Possibility Thinker: A Creative Genius persistently thinks about the possibilities that are available to them at any one moment in time. They fully understand that focusing on “possibilities” will expand opportunities, conversely, paying attention to “limitations” will only attract a greater array of problems into their lives.
Risk Taker: A Creative Genius fully understands that without “risk” there can be no worthwhile rewards. They therefore take risks by thinking differently, by taking chances, and by utilizing creative techniques and strategies in a unique, untried and unorthadox manner.
Focused: A Creative Genius is fully focused and locked mentally on the goals they seek to achieve. They dare not break this lock until the moment their objectives are fully realized within their physical reality.
Imaginative: A Creative Genius utilizes the full capacity of their imagination to bend the laws of reality to find the answers and opportunities they need to overcome the challenges in their life.
Dedicated: A Creative Genius is fully committed and dedicated to the outcomes and objectives they seek to achieve. They simply will not allow distractions or circumstances to push them off course. If however they do get sidetracked, than they are quick to adjust their sails to the changing winds and alter their course accordingly.
Patient: A Creative Genius realizes that creativity is a process that involves patience and careful preparation. They don’t try to force answers, instead they proactively make slight adjustments in their approach to open up new perspectives and understandings that will unlock the solutions and opportunities they have been searching for.
Proactive: A Creative Genius is constantly moving forward towards their objectives. This doesn’t mean being “action oriented” 24/7. However, it does mean focusing your body and mind on tasks and activities that keep you moving forward towards your goals consistently every single day. They always ask themselves “Is this activity taking me closer to my goals, or is it pulling me away?” The answer redirects their thinking and actions towards their creative objectives.
Courageous: A Creative Genius is courageous in action and thought. They are always willing to try new things and break the rules and boundaries limiting the average mind. And it is for this reason that the impossible becomes possible within their perspective of reality.
Independent: A Creative Genius is an independent thinker and doer. Yes, they seek other perspectives, ideas and opinions, however in the end, it is their independence that allows for the flow of unique, insightful and creative ideas.
Intuitive: A Creative Genius is a very intuitive soul. They fully understand that some answers can only be realized when they have an intuitive understanding of the world and the problem they are facing.
Persistent: A Creative Genius is fully aware if they persistent long enough over a consistent period of time, that every problem can be solved in a surprising and creative way. For this reason they bring forth a resilient attitude to every challenge confronting their reality.
Curious & Playful Nature: A Creative Genius approaches every task or activity in a curiously playful manner. Reminiscent of a child learning something new for the very first time. A Creative Genius fully appreciates that only curiosity and playfulness is able to relax their mind and bring forth its fullest creative potential.
The Indispensable Beliefs of a Creative GeniusBelief in Self: A Creative Genius has full confidence and belief in themselves and their own ability. This confidence supports every aspect of their personality, helping them to approach problems with passion and excitement.
Belief in a Higher Power: A Creative Genius isn’t necessarily religious in nature (although they can be). However, they do believe that there exists a higher power - a collective consciousness or infinite intelligence of sorts - that helps spark the creative forces within their body and mind.
Belief in Learning from every Success & Failure: A Creative Genius essentially does not distinguish between success or failure. Instead, they only acknowledge the feedback they receive from personal experience, from the environment and from others. This feedback helps them to transform their creative approach when confronted with the same circumstances in the future.
The Strategic Self-Talk of a Creative GeniusQuestions: A Creative Genius constantly and persistently asks questions that are focused on expanding the possibilities of reality and on solutions that will help them overcome the problems confronting their daily life experience.
Words: A Creative Genius speaks a language that is optimistic and naturally reflective. They see the positives of every situation and approach it in a reflective manner that expands possibilities and moves them closer to solutions.
The Proactive Actions of a Creative GeniusProactive Learning: A Creative Genius fully understands that life is a process of constant and never ending learning and self-improvement. They are aware that the more they know, the better they will be able to think about the challenges confronting their daily reality. As a result, they constantly and persistently seek out new knowledge, feedback and ideas about the world they live in.
Process Orientation: A Creative Genius always has an end goal in mind, however they are fully focused on the intricacies of their thoughts and actions within the present moment. They understand that within every moment lies the seed of opportunity that will help them expand the way they think and approach their life circumstances.
Journaling: A Creative Genius keeps a regular record of their life experiences, learnings and questions within a journal. The simple process of jotting their thoughts down on paper, helps to expand their understanding about themselves, others and the world around them. Moreover, the act of journaling progressively guides their thoughts gently down creative channels that naturally expand the possibilities of reality.
Mind Mapping: A Creative Genius consistently uses a set of accelerated learning tools that help to build strong associations between seemingly unrelated ideas within their minds. Mind Mapping is much like an “information process puzzle” that helps to piece together, organize and expand on thoughts in surprising ways - potentially leading to dramatic and life transforming creative ideas.
These Creative qualities are very much like muscles that must be trained and built over the course of days, weeks, months and years. The more time you spend flexing these muscles and utilizing them to expand the possibilities and your understanding of reality, the stronger, more creative, effective and efficient they will become. And it is only when you have these qualities ingrained deeply within your psyche, that your true Creative Genius Capacity will finally shine through.
Adam Sicinski is a qualified Life Coach whose areas of specialty include accelerated learning, cognitive psychology, NLP and mind mapping principles. He integrates these methods seamlessly into his blog posts by creating visual IQ Matrixes of the information he is presenting. See examples at the IQ Matrix Blog.
Related PostsThe George Costanza Lifehack for Overcoming Fear and Anxiety
Despite what you may think, there are lifehacks to be learned from the television show Seinfeld. Take for example the episode “The Opposite”- George Costanza decides that every decision that he has ever made has been wrong, and that his life is the exact opposite of what it should be. George decides to do the opposite of everything he has done before, and great things begin to happen to him:
What George inadvertently discovers is Victor Frankl’s lifehack for overcoming fear and anxiety, called paradoxical intention.
If you want to overcome fear and anxiety (including obsessive-compulsiveness and phobias), do the opposite of what you ordinarily do- deliberately wish for that which you fear, in order to remove it. According to patient statistics, paradoxical intention is successful in 80-90% of cases.
As fitting with a Seinfeld episode, humor is the key to using paradoxical intention. “The neurotic who learns to laugh at himself may be on the way to self-management, perhaps to cure”, says Godon W. Allport in his book The Individual and His Religion. Unable to maintain your diet due to fear of food binging? Eat as much as you can next week. Unable to fall asleep due to fear of sleeplessness? Try to stay awake as long as possible. The pure absurdity and humor of such suggestions are what allows one to put himself at a distance from his own fear and anxiety.
How Paradoxical Intention WorksFrankl says, “as soon as the patient stops fighting his obsessions and instead tries to ridicule them by dealing with them in an ironic way- by applying paradoxical intention- the vicious circle is cut, the symptom diminishes and finally atrophies.” Paradoxical intention seems to reverse the patient’s attitude, taking the wind out of the sails of anxiety.
Sweating Out Your FearsAn example was given in Frankl’s book Man’s Search for Meaning. A young physician who had a fear of perspiring. His anticipatory anxiety of perspiration actually caused him to excessively sweat around certain individuals. Frankl advised the patient to use paradoxical intention, by deliberately showing people how much he could sweat. When the patient tried this, he was able to permanently free himself of a 4-year-old phobia, within one week.
Paradoxical Intention is Not a PanaceaIf you are fighting anticipatory anxiety, obsessive-compulsive thoughts, or phobias, my suggestion is to give paradoxical intention a try. But if you are having suicidal thoughts, or have a mental disorder such as schizophrenia, paradoxical intention is not a good solution. I’m not an expert on paradoxical intention, and I don’t want to mislead anyone with this post- please do your own research, and talk to a medical professional if your condition is serious.
Derek Ralston writes for Life Evolver, a blog which provides insightful tips for individuals to make positive, sustainable changes in their lives.
Related Posts5 Hacks Just For Writers
It seems like all of us have intensive writing projects going on at any given time. Considering how much creative power such a project can require, it just makes sense to minimize the efforts we have to make for any part of our projects other than the actual writing. In that spirit, these hacks can help you keep your writing on track, and I’ve included a few of the technical resources I use to simplify these hacks.
Outlining is a dirty word for a lot of people. But having some method of planning the end result of your writing is absolutely necessary, and outlining can be an easy approach. Personally, I got away from outlining anything shorter than 1,500 words a long time ago. Instead, when I add a new writing project to my task list, I make a couple of notes about it:
- Expected word length
- Exact topic
- Who I might need to interview
- Style (such as blog post or letter)
- Due date
I’ve gone to some effort to make this note-taking process easy to manage. Since I already use Remember the Milk to manage a lot of my tasks, I’ve just taken to keeping these notes with the task themselves. I’ve made it a matter of key strokes to add a form to my notes that I can just fill in: since I use Firefox, I use the plugin Text Complete to allow me to just dump in the form quickly.
2. Keep your notes organized.The fastest way to stop my work entirely is to not be able to find a note that I made for a given project. Maybe I made a note about how to proceed, or maybe it’s the contact information for an interview subject. Either way, I’ve been known to spend hours looking for a note when I really ought to be writing.
How you manage your note-taking can be very personal: recently I’ve become fond of Evernote. But you don’t have to go with a fancy web app — the important factor is whether you can make sure all your notes wind up in the same place with minimal effort. I know plenty of people who actually rely on two note-taking systems. One is technical and relies on the computer, while the other is some combination of pen and paper for those ideas that strike when the computer is nowhere near.
3. Create a pattern.There is a certain mindset that goes along with writing well. It isn’t a talent that you are either born with or must cultivate; instead, the writing mindset is a question of being able to focus on the task at hand. The easiest way I’ve found for getting into the writing mindset is to create a pattern: if I sit down to write every day at the same time, I can focus on my writing faster.
Especially if you have a large or long-term project, setting aside the same block of time regularly can get you in the habit of writing. And just like any habit, it becomes easier to do after you’ve been doing for a while. I rely on a timer to get me in the writing mindset. I set it for however many minutes I plan to write and then just don’t leave my desk — or my word processing program — until the timer dings. I’ve noticed that not only can I start writing with less time necessary to get my mind in gear, but I also write more in a given time period than I ever thought possible. I want to get all those words down before the timer goes off.
4. Delegate the things you don’t really need to do.In general, you can’t delegate writing — sure, you can hire a writer for a project, but it can be much harder to get a writer going in the style that you want than a bookkeeper. But there are plenty of writing-related tasks that you can easily delegate. Editing is a task I prefer to delegate, for instance. I find it difficult to edit something I wrote. After all, I already know what I want the article or story or whatever to say.
Transcription is another example: if you record an interview, you’ll wind up spending a lot of time transcribing it — at least as long as the original interview was. You can hire a transcriptionist relatively inexpensively and spend your time more productively.
There are tons of smaller tasks that go into writing, but the writer doesn’t actually have to do all of them. It’s not unreasonable to assume that your time is worth money. Pay for someone else to do transcription, editing or whatever — they’ll do it faster (and maybe even better) than you will and you can get back to writing.
5. Concentrate on productivity.Writing is a little different from most of the other tasks that can wind up on your to-do list: it can take varying amounts of time and, despite the fact that you’re technically just sitting there, it can take amazing amounts of energy. Despite those differences, you can make sure your writing time is just as productive as the hours you block off for other things. You can outsource a few tasks and make the process smoother by preparing a bit in advance. It’s just a matter of applying the same ideas about productivity to your writing as you do for any other task.
Thursday Bram is a freelance journalist of over five years experience. She studied Communications at the University of Tulsa and is currently working on her MA in Communication Design. Her work has focused primarily on entrepreneurial topics. More information about Thursday is available at thursdaybram.com.
Related Posts11 Free Mind Mapping Applications & Web Services
Mind mapping is a way of taking notes, capturing ideas, exploring concepts and breaking down information into a more readily understood format. It’s a place where visual representations and written representations of things merge to create something that is more natural to the mind; it works with and represents the way we think, where as paragraph-based text is not representative of the thought process at all.
There are a million and one uses for mind mapping. You can use it to study for a big exam. You can use it brainstorm new article ideas, or flesh out what needs to be covered in the business plan for a new venture. You can organize a big move of house; heck, I’ve seen people use the mind map format for their daily to-do lists (each to their own, eh?).
There are huge advantages to creating your mind maps with paper and pen. In fact, though I’ve tried many different mind mapping programs over the years, pen and paper remains my favorite way of creating them. Some would say that it is a part of the process. That said, there are distinct advantages in using software and sometimes you need to decide what the best tool for the job is on a case by case basis. For when that time comes, here are 11 free mind mapping applications and web services.
Freemind is one of the most popular free mind mapping applications out there, and that’s mainly because it’s in Java and thus cross-platform (and because it’s a great app, of course). This software implements some of the major features that digital task lists have over paper task lists: retractable and expandable branches and hyperlinking between different branches make it easier to organize and easier to connect ideas.
bubble.us is a free web-based mind mapping application. You can sign up for an account in order to save your mind maps, but better still, they don’t force you to get an account to start creating. The interface could use some work to make it a truly usable application.
Semantik is a KDE Linux application for creating mind maps, though they can be viewed in different formats, such as a linear tree view with retractable and expandable branches.
MindMeister is another web app with varying account options; there’s a free account, and several commercial options. It has a fairly nice design and interface in comparison with many other mind mapping web apps that are available.
RecallPlus is commercial software with a lighter free edition. It combines the process of mind mapping with flash card memorization techniques, and is aimed at students who wish to take notes and then test themselves using them. RecallPlus is a Windows application.
Mindomo is another mind mapping web app with both a free account option and a commercial one. It allows you to share your mind maps with others, and also embed them into your web pages.
Mind42 is a totally free mind mapping web app and it is one of my favorites. The interface is a good one, and it has some excellent features such as easy navigation for large mind maps with zoom and birdview (and branch hiding, but that’s pretty standard these days), and the ability to attach notes and images to branches, which isn’t always allowed in “pure” mind mapping software. You can also link branches to other sites and see a preview when you rollover the link, which I think is probably the only appropriate use of those preview rollovers anywhere on the net.
Labyrinth is a very simple and basic mind mapping application for Linux and Windows.
Vym (View Your Mind) is an application for Mac OS X and various Linux distributions. There seems to be a Windows port, but it is accompanied by bug reports.
WiseMapping is another web app for mind mapping which requires no browser plug-ins at all, which is fantastic when you don’t know which computers you’ll be using in a given day. You can share, export and publish your mind maps from the app and there is no commercial account option; everything is free and unlimited.
PersonalBrain is a cross-platform application. It’s a commercial application, but a lighter free edition is on offer. I thought the integration of a calendar with events that you can add was a particularly cool addition and means you can brainstorm in not just the conceptual realm but cross over into the earlier stages of planning as well.
Mind mapping is one of those areas where it has always been hard to find a good native OS X application. It always surprises me when I find more Linux options than OS X options! I tend to go for the web apps, but Freemind in particular is good for any user on any popular platform. If I were to suggest one particular web app, I’d suggest Mind42. While I’ve used the Windows and Linux apps before, I can’t give a strong recommendation as I’ve not used any for the long-term.
Offering a unique perspective and insight on productivity based on his experience as a writer, musician, family man and manager, Joel Falconer has been published online and off, and brings to Lifehack's readers practical advice you can use to be more efficient and effective.
Related PostsHelp a Reporter (and Yourself) Out
Ever wonder where journalists and other writers find the experts they quote in their stories? In the past, reporters counted on their own networking, and on a service called ProfNet. ProfNet lets journalists search their database of experts and contact them individually to see if they’d be interested in being interviewed.
Until recently, ProfNet has been about the only game in town, as far as finding real experts is concerned. Which might be why their website is a little less than user-friendly – no competition. But things have been shaken up rather thoroughly in the last couple months, with the arrival on the scene of a new service aiming to connect journalists and experts.
Help A Reporter Out (HARO) is the brainchild of Peter Shankman, founder and CEO of marketing/PR firm The Geek Factory, Inc. The idea is simple, but incredibly powerful. Journalists post requests using a simple form, detailing their story and the kind of expert they’re looking for. Experts – on whatever – subscribe to the HARO mailing list. A few times a day, the requests over the last several hours are compiled and sent out to everyone on the mailing list. Subscribers skim the list and see if there are any stories they feel they can contribute to, and they email the reporter directly.
It’s that simple. It’s almost stupid! But it works – in a few months it’s membership has grown to over 12,000 people and Shankman is sending out 50 or more HARO requests a day.
Why bother to help a reporter out?Why should you take the time and energy to read HARO’s twice- or thrice-daily email, looking for HARO requests that apply to you?
There are several answers, all of them good. The first, of course, is that you know something that might help a reporter to be more informative or more accurate, and therefore in some small way you can contribute to the world’s store of knowledge. That’s what knowledge is for, after all – sharing.
But, you say, I get paid for sharing my knowledge. Hey, good on ya! Maybe the warm fuzzies aren’t enough.
Fair enough. While journalistic ethics generally precedes paying sources, people who volunteer to help reporters with their story get another kind of payment: exposure. And no minor exposure, either – being quoted in a major newspaper or national magazine can bring a flood of traffic to your site, new clients, job offers, you name it. And smaller outlets can be just as good,or even better – being quoted as an expert by a niche publication means that the people who will see your name referred to as the go-to guy or gal on your topic are exactly the people you most want to see you as an expert.
PR folks know this, which is why when I sent out a HARO request recently, about 1/3 of the responses I got were publicists and marketing folk offering to connect me with their clients. It’s an excellent opportunity to establish yourself as an expert in your field.
There’s one more reason to respond to HARO requests: it can be fun. You get to share your thoughts with someone who, while maybe not an expert, at least has an interest in the field you work in (usually, or the story would have been assigned to someone else). Speaking with a skilled interviewer is a great way to clarify your own thinking, too.
What if I need some help, too?HARO is, at least for now, an open system. I’ve seen requests from bloggers, in-house writers, people taking surveys, and of course actual jourrnalists on assignment. There is no verification system in place to make sure your request is “legitimate”, and while that might become a problem down the line, for now it’s working pretty well. (I shouldn’t say no verification system – people aren’t going to respond to requests that seem phony or amateurish, so in that sense, the system is self-regulating).
What that means is that, if you need to interview an expert, and can offer a reasonable amount of exposure, there’s no real reason not to try a HARO request.
And it works. My first HARO request was for an expert n what I thought was a pretty obscure topic. Within a few hours, I had 14 responses! What’s more, almost all of them were good – real, bona fide experts in the rather tiny niche I was writing about.
If you want to improve your chances of getting a decent response, there are a few things you should do:
- Be real: I can imagine all sorts of ways that people are going to try to game the HARO system. Here’s the thing, though – you’re interacting with real people – smart ones, at that. They are experts, after all. If your request comes off as scammy, you won’t get a response – but even if your request does get a response, people will realize soon enough that you’re full of… it when you start responding of when you get them on the phone.
- Explain your topic thoroughly: HARO gives plenty of room to describe who you’re looking for; be as specific as you can. Don’t think you’re being clever by being vague, or that you’ll improve your chances of finding someone if your request is so loosely worded that just about anyone might feel that they’re the right person for you. The people who sign up for HARO’s list are looking for particular requests that they feel a connection with. Ideally, you want a handful of people to read your request and feel like you’re talking about them specifically.
- Be respectful: You don’t get to expect a response, you get to appreciate one. If someone takes the time to respond to your request, even if you can’t use them for your project, try at least to respond and tell them “no thanks”. You never know when you might need their assistance in the future, so don’t burn any bridges by being a jerk.
I, for one, will be watching closely to see how Help A Reporter Out develops. It’s such a simple idea, but it works – and in the long run, may be a huge step forward for journalism. And for self-promotion – what a great way to get yourself noticed by people in your niche!
I’d love to hear other people’s stories about HARO. If you have any, please share them with us in the comments.
Dustin M. Wax is the project manager at Stepcase Lifehack. He is also the creator of The Writer's Technology Companion, a site devoted to the tools of the writing trade. When he's not writing, he teaches anthropology and gender studies in Las Vegas, NV. He is the author of Don't Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College.
Related PostsHow to Love Yourself, Even if No One Else Does
Photo by Toronja Azul
First, the second part of that title isn’t true. You either forgot who loves you, or need to find more people who do.
But there may be times where you feel alone and depressed — just about everyone has spells like that, or is strong enough to admit it. It’s not easy to talk about, but loneliness, feeling unwanted, and even self-hate from time to time is extremely common. If your hermiting drags on for weeks, you’ll want the help of healthcare experts, but if it’s not so severe and happens on occasion, here’s some vibrant and practical suggestions for you:
Gather a “praise pile”Ideally, you’ll want to do this before you’re in a downer — it serves as a life preserver when you’re in the “eye of the storm”.
Compile the love you’ve felt: a handwritten note from your Mom, a photo of you and your best buds at the lake together, and awards you’ve won. They don’t have to be recent — recognition spans your whole life. And they don’t have to be physical, either; I’ve used the Firefox ScrapBook add-on to do what its offline analogue does: clip and save kind words from others. Like my Lifehack comments. 
Photo by Kaká
So when I feel like I’m not being cared about, I take a quick look at the “praise pile”, and put what’s happening in perspective: others have cared about me before, and they will again. And perhaps most importantly, by realizing this, I care about myself. This is a process and never happens immediately. One can’t instantly “snap out of it”. It “takes time”, as the trite-but-true saying goes. But oh, how true it is.
According to How to get Rich, Donald Trump keeps a box of mementos much as what I’ve described. He sure seems like he loves himself a lot.
Give up on something worth droppingBurdens are bedfellows with loneliness. Some people who’d like to have more of a social life are crushed by the rat race, or their own compounded fears which hold them back. By dropping what I often call “slop” (waste unnecessary to your enjoyment of life), it frees you to take on more meaningful things (keep reading!). Less worry means more freedom to self-explore and pursue interests.
Why does this sound so obvious? Because it is. But it may only be during a time of emotional inner turbulence that you can summon the strength to unchain yourself.
Don’t overthink — that makes it worse. If you watched the recent Olympics in Beijing, notice how many top athletes (gymnasts in particular) have such a fluid momentum that you might wonder if they’re thinking consciously at all. As any great performer knows, and as controversial as “muscle memory” may be, repeated practice leads to what’s dubbed “second nature”, or a threshold surpassed in which analyzing evolves to intuition based on past experiences.
When you find yourself especially stressed or anxious, those are otherwise-unpleasant moments you can use to your advantage. Especially if you’re crying and in a lot of anguish, determine in a flash what’s worth keeping, and visualize it like this: you are a burning building. If you could rush into yourself and save only a handful of things to take to a new you, what will they be?
Write them down, and set the list aside until you feel more rational. Then look at it again, and join your thoughts of the now with what you had felt then. This can be a potent truth-revealing exercise and puts you on the right track.
Find something new worth fighting forBy “fight”, I refer not to violence. Rather, I speak of a cause you can champion and stand up for. The “fight” here is versus adversity. Your cause may be a charity that improves others’ lives, or even a campaign to save a TV show. Notice how these purposes require others to get involved — they’re inherently social, and even though you may not think about so much about that (and shouldn’t), they’ll lead to you interacting with others, feeling less lonely.
Being recognized as a maverick and a leader isn’t a deliberate process you need to set up like a goal. Rather, the goals here are more about the innate satisfaction and happiness you’ll feel.
A couple examples from my experiences: when I felt snobs were scaring away novices from enjoying electronic music, I spoke up against them, serving as a pillar of light for new fans. I wrote reviews and guides, increasing techno music’s accessibility. The adulation felt awesome. And more recently in a professional capacity, I’ve connected knowledge resources for the virtual world of Second Life, helping our community to have happier experiences. I began as a fan, and came to love what I do (and myself) so much that I ended up working for the company.
Growth is like that — you may not know where you’ll precisely end up, but you should always be passionate about growth and know where you want to head. Even if it’s not a single direction, mixing disciplines and skillsets will create a unique fusion that no one else has, and that’s a strong reason to love your uniqueness.
Celebrate your similarities AND differencesToo many people make the mistake of singling out what’s common or how they’re different. This is defective, too-filtered thinking, because success is neither wholly familiar or alien: it’s both. All of us are humans and subject to emotions. By consequence, all of us have problems — but some of us deal with them more effectively than others. We are all variations on a common theme.
Photo by Vermin Inc
If you’re concerned about body image, it’s good for all humans to be healthy. But it’s unachievable to duplicate someone else’s figure — Jocelyn Wildenstein taught us that with her approximation of a cat. After perusing existing possibilities, you need to do what’s right for you (including Jocelyn — if she’s happy, that’s what matters) and being inspired by someone isn’t the same as cloning them: it’s taking your hero’s “recipe” and improvising a new mix with it.
Be brave about what you really likeI used to get dirty faces when I opined how much I liked Britney Spears’ song, “Toxic“. I’m fond of the slick music video coupled with the angular strings and slammin’ beats. Britney’s voice wasn’t bad, either. I don’t approve of her recent lifestyle choices, but true to my heart, that song was a masterpiece!
Many people have secret “guilty pleasures”, be they pop songs or other recreational activities. If it does no harm to your health and well-being, why must it be guilty? Strip away the “layers of mindfat” and be earnest. This prepares you to meet other likeminds (as opposed to “lowminds”, who don’t contribute to your interests).
Here’s the problem: so many of us, even those who are no longer teens or in college, live under the specter of “peer pressure”. We’re afraid we “won’t fit in” if we speak to the contrary. And especially if we dig something that’s popular, we’ll be subjected to redundant reminders like “Just because it’s popular doesn’t mean it’s good”.
You need not get into wasteful wordwars and endless debates about the merits of something. If you feel a certain other person or group repeatedly opposes what you care about and that’s regularly getting you down, then spend more time with people who do share your appreciation. The Internet is laden with all manner of subcultures and microcliques, so even if you’re geographically-challenged, it’s possible to find others you connect with.
We infact live in an era of social networking saturation, so I approve of trying various tools and simply sticking with what you use regularly — doing reveals being, and you may just clowning around… but hey! you’re in this together.
Photo by scragz
Furthermore, some minor threads expand grossly when more people speak up about how much they like ‘em, e.g., how Gaia Online and deviantART have expanded from tiny niches to nourish vast anime communities. Investing in your happiness is like playing the stock market: subject to fluctuation, but hopeful for long-term growth.
Be a little more selfishSelfishness is always bad, right? Of course not! (What’s up with these lame generalizations?) Some people are prone to giving too much to others and not feeding themselves, so if this is you, you need to adjust. My wife once shared her meat story with me, which is a delicious, terse tale about feeding yourself, and being careful who you give your “meat” (yourself, essentially) to.
You need to be strong before you can strengthen others. It’s true that in giving to others, you may experience a positive feedback loop of joy, but you need something to start that off.
Feeling your own dreams are denied because you’re always supporting others? Let them know what you want to pursue, and if they’re quality people, they should come to collaborate on yours in-kind.
Love flows both ways in the best relationships.
Adapt, evolve, iterate
Photo by monky.cl
A single word, and a powerful one, with linked notions like “evolve” and “iterate”! I’m a genre geek, so I’ve got to mention the beast who killed Superman, Doomsday. If you’re not familiar with his backstory, he was an alien creature who was subject to repeated death, reincarnated repeatedly to adapt to harsher conditions (and more death). He evolved to a level where he could, well, murder Supes. Less-gruesome variations on this theme can be found in Stargate SG-1’s Replicators and The Incredibles‘ Omnidroid.
For some reason, I can’t think of any heroic examples at the moment, so you’ll want to be the opposite of the aforementioned: emotions come in cycles, and each time you go through feeling unloved, benefit from it. Go deep inside your head and familiarize yourself with why you feel this way, what triggers it, and when this is most likely to happen. By learning you, you’ll have better control over the cause-and-effect of your unhappiness. Extreme cases require medical treatment, but in the vast majority of instances, you have, or will adapt to have the power to do something substantial.
Write a guide helping othersHere we are — the self-referential part! Yet, sharing experiences is valuable. If you have a blog, or even make a comment on someone else’s blog, you may help others. And they may let you know — I hope so!
Save that feedback in your “praise pile”. You’ll need it for a rainy day, to remind you of the good you’ve done.
Don’t ever think “I’m not good enough” or “I don’t know enough”. Having struggled with pain, you’re good enough. Having experienced suffering, you know all about it.
With all the talk about “believing in yourself”, that should never be taken in a vacuum. Each one of us is influenced in positive and negative ways by external forces, and our lives are never static. The balance is dynamic, our moods shifting by day, or even by hours. What we choose to expose ourselves to and participate in is a large deterministic factor on our world outlook, and this is especially true in an age where more people choose what news they’ll watch, not because it reports with objectivity, but because it tells them what they want to hear. (A topic I may expand on later.)
Writing a guide — even if it’s a few self-confessional paragraphs — provides self-validation, too. Simply “getting it out” makes you feel better, and based on what I said above, don’t waste attention on those who don’t appreciate your bravery. Gravitate to those who do.
Ultimately, it’s initially hard to “pull yourself out” when you’re feeling kicked like a stray dog. But this is why I shared the above — there’ve been times where I was sure everyone hated me, but then I realized (with increasing strength over the years) that this was just a temporal lie, my fallible emotions playing a nasty trick.
I rode through the proverbial storm with “praise pile” in hand, discovered new things about myself along the way, and went through that cycle enough times to arrive where I’m at today. That’s why I’m sharing this with you.
Photo by Picherthis
How do you love yourself? Let me know in the comments!
Torley amplifies your awesome with the useful and fun.
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